On second, third and fourth thought…

Never mind on the book posts. I’m still reading, of course, but there’s not much point talking about it. My read-books list should be public over in the sidebar. I am happy to report that my TBR list is below 80 now, and I hope to keep whittling it down.

I had meant to set aside November to work on the next book, but it’s been extremely difficult to keep going in the wake of the second book’s failure. I tried to educate myself on plotting and tried to write a book that was better than the first, but it simply did not work. Maybe a little structure is worse than no structure, in the end. I’m not sure what exactly went wrong, but wrong it went, all the same.

It’s no mystery that my mild depressive tendencies make this more difficult, as well. Where others might have powered through and locked down what it takes to improve the third book, I floundered.  There’s so much I don’t understand — why the first book occasionally sells a copy despite its age, why the second was so much worse than the first (3%!), how to make the third book better than the second. There just aren’t answers, and so it isn’t clear how to make things better.

I’m working on an outline for book 3, slowly, sporadically, trying to impose as much structure as I can. My brain just doesn’t work in terms of plot points, beats, rising action, etc., so it’s like herding cats. Meanwhile, the numbers question why I’m doing any of this. 3% of 3% would equal less than one sale, if the drop-off in quality continues at this rate.

99% of the time, when I get home, I just retreat to reading other people’s books and playing other people’s games and running from the whole debacle. Maybe, in time, I’ll have the energy to pour into a wholly useless pursuit just for the sake of doing it. It’s difficult right now.

Two things:

  1. I’ve finished the September/October book roundup, but it still needs to be formatted, and I gotta sleep.
  2. Thanks to the encouragement of my Ultimate Beta Reader and spouse (who are the same person), I’m going to spend November finally outlining and beginning Book 3, working-titled The Healers’ Life. It is threatening to become 2 books, which makes me want to cry, but we’ll see what happens once the outline solidifies.